I am not asking me to disconnect myself from the limited part of me which right now is my body and the intellect that accompanies the body through out the day. I am not asking me to fly off and dissociate with the body to remain only in this unlimited space that has the capacity to remind me of who I am without the body and without its limitations. I am not asking me  to avoid being in the discomfort or the gravity that comes with being in the body. I am only asking me to make space momentarily to connect beyond my physicality. This allows me to recognize that when I struggle I am not permanently trapped there, like I use to think,  or I  am not just the struggles I  experience with this limited version of me. Giving space to connect beyond the limited version of myself  brings some awareness some clarity some curiosity some light, when something presents itself as a obstacle as a something I would resist and push away. That connection helps to slow things down so I am able to become aware that the limited version of me is attracted to and  desperately wants to rely on my automatic response (instinct). My automatic responses need to speed things up, to act fast and return to safety ASAP. This mechanism has confused and left my mind in a frozen state a great deal and just like I did when I was giving birth when I felt those overwhelming contractions, the reaction at that point, was to push and scream out the baby for the pain that those contractions created, to stop.  When an adult as residues of unprocessed traumas and has a habit in turning to trauma responses to deal with tiggers to deal with unwanted hurt and is introduced to the safe space, this safe space becomes an escape. This safe space becomes a way to avoid dealing or processing, and making peace with, loving, scattered parts of me that was a result of trauma. Finally these scattered parts these, little parts in me, are left feeling hurt, neglected and abandoned. It has become crucial in my journey of moving through this passage of limitedness to leave no parts of myself behind. So I made a promise to myself to not use that safe space anymore to dissociate and deny some hidden hurt that often shows up in internal or external interactions I would have. My daughter as an amazing talent in pointing out those unresolved spots, those parts hiding who are feeling so embarrassed to be seen, to me. Children do this to their parents. I learned later on to see this as a gift, not in the moment when it just happens of course but later when I gave myself the opportunity to sit and connect with the little part or one of its protectors, that is asking to be heard to be seen and held while feeling the hurt.