To start with. Have I ever felt safe? Describing a situation a moment when I felt so safe I knew that nothing could move me away from that place in my mind. That beautiful fresh and sunny morning, at 4 am. One of those unique moment when being light so early didn’t matter. West London, [...]
The last time I saw you, at the lake Delton parking lot. Picking up your bags of clothes from B’ s car, saying goodbye for ever because this whole situation is…..hopeless. Kirk, probably high, telling me that now is the time you really need me in your life, that he was taking care of you [...]
Day one of not using. I picked you up from Merrissa on Sunday drove us to the river and that was the last sort of precious moment I would have with you. As if this had been a set up to say our good goodbyes because if from this point on you do not save [...]
Yesterday we attended our first virtual funeral. My husband's grand mother from Holland past away last week at the age of 103. I was nicely surprise on how well organised this virtual event took place. My husband and I located in the States could be part of the celebration of Oma's life. We lit a [...]
Where is Self????? I kept asking myself yestersay as I was feeling deezy and my head was spining ready to explode. I felt my energy was being drained minute after minute, as if I had a serious cut and blood was flowing out of my body heavily. At this point I think I am in [...]
Here is a very common and popular pattern I was accustomed to for so long and also blind about and that I have used for quite a long time unconsciously with my closest relationships. My daughter or my husband have a little habit to press that one spots in my mind labeled as "please react" [...]
At the end of us it feels like we are parting going our separate ways never to be with one another again. At the end of us our hearts are broken, a cloud of hatred is floting between us. A part of me detaches from me and remains bitter pushing anger where it can be [...]